A Reality Dose

Happy Thanksgiving and Stuffisis

2009-11-25T20:20:00.001-05:00

Well its that time of year again where most of us are thinkin about how much food we can/will stuff down our throats ::insert raised brow:: I know im goin to my mama’s house wit my own togo containers lol..but lets disect the word for a minute shall we??? Ok..great

thanks⋅giv⋅ing
[thangks-giv-ing]
–noun
1. the act of giving thanks; grateful acknowledgment of benefits or favors, esp. to God.

2. an expression of thanks, esp. to God.

3. a public celebration in acknowledgment of divine favor or kindness.

4. a day set apart for giving thanks to God.

Well with the definition of the word posted lemme take a min and state some of the things that im truly thankful for…I thank God for:
1. Health/Strength

2. Family (mainly my mother) for setting a wonderful example for me growing up. Even tho we’ve had our hard times (extremely hard..ill post on those later) we’ve managed to save our relationship and now she’s like my best friend and I can talk to her about absolutely anything.

3. Friends who are like my family. Anyone who knows me knows that I keep my friend circle small and I don’t use the term “friend” loosely. My friends have been there for me n good times and bad. Although we piss each other off at times we always come back and remember our friendship.

4. A Job..even tho I hate it at times and dread getting up and goin to work, I know I’m making a difference in some child’s life….and hell it pays the bills lol

5. My HOUSE…Lord knows wut I went thru to get in this place..and my friends can tell u that it wasn’t easy..and hell its still not east now..but I know God didn’t bring me this far to leave me.

6. My sense of self…used to have a low self-esteem issue (and at times it still resurfaces) but I am more confident in myself. I’ve learned that if I set my mind to it 9 times outta 10 I will achieve it.

7. Food…not just for eating..but to allow my creative nature to come to fruition….not sayin that im some culinary master but I gets it in n the kitchen…and cooking allows me to provide my friends/family with a loving meal.

8. Liquor..i know ya’ll r like “Really Twin??? Liquor?!?!” yeah im thankful for alcohol….oh well..moving on lol

9. Im thankful for finishing grad school..and the opportunity to start a business (more info coming soon)

10. Im thankful that I know all of my problems whether they be financial, emotional, economical or wuteva…will be taken care of.

This is just a mini list of the many blessings that I’m thankful for….anything ya’ll wanna mention??

Oh Friday

2009-11-23T20:22:00.003-05:00

Friday was pretty cool..hit Fridays wit Fuzzy and Scooter and had a grand ol time lol…for those who don’t know bout this one Fridays in West Orange…lemme tell u…u need to hit that spot up for their late nite happy hour..not only is the food good but they use actual liquor n their drinks!!!! Now I know some of ya’ll are like “Now Twin actual liquor??? Really?!?!? Wut else would they use?” Well lemme answer that question for u…at the Fridays we usually go to the drinks aren’t strong at all and I swear they use imitation liquor or essence of alcohol or some other crap like that cuz all that happens at that place is a tab being rung up wit no intoxication…WTF?!?!?!

But the one in West Orange is a whoolllleee different story…Fuzzy and I experienced the effect of this fridays before on a random Friday nite, but this was Scooter’s first time….well 5 LIT’s later we were n there actin a damn fool..jus laughin and enjoyin each other’s company….and of course checkin out all the eye candy that was there (pssssstttttt come here..u aint hear this from me but that Fridays is a filled wit DL dudes wit their dates…a lot of topics for conversation..but u aint hear it from me..if anybody asks Fuzzy told u)

After stumbling outta Fridays we ventured over to another friends house cuz she was having a small gathering and I said I would try to stop thru..well after closing out Fridays we ended up over there at about 1:30ish. Got there and the music was goin but there was no liquor flowing…don’t u jus luv when folks host something but have nothing to offer (mental note…save that topic for a later post lol)…I know it was BYOB but damn u couldn’t have a cheap bottle of vodka or something…seriously?!?!?! I mean we 3 walked n the door and it was like “Heyyyyyy please tell me u brought a bottle” Well hello to u too damn lol. Between the 3 of us we had 2 bottles but only brought in one cuz my tipsy ass forgot my bottle n the car and wasn’t tryin to walk down all them steps, fumble around wit Scooter’s keys, search for the bottle, close the door, lock the car, and all that other foolishness..no u can have a coke..next

Well needless to say I didn’t last long at the house…I had been up and goin non-stop since 6:15 that morning and it was about 3:00 when I passed out on that couch…I was told I missed some good convo but oh well…I was good and tipsy and tired…baby nite nite

Woke up and went home..and that was the end of a good Friday for me lol……

Happy Friday!!!!

2009-11-22T16:21:00.004-05:00

Happy Friday,

Hey blog fam…its finally Friday and I couldn’t wait for it to get here…the past week have been kinda busy for me and Im jus looking forward to not having to do anything for the next couple of days. I had a couple meetings this week cuz I’m n the process of learning how to start a business cuz in today’s time who doesn’t need a part-time hustle… right?!?!?!? So far I’ve been listenin to a bunch of cd’s and hearing different speakers and tryin to learn as much about it as possible so I can be profitable thru it…oh joy lol.

As I looked thru my house this morn as Im walkin out the door I noticed that I need to clean…uggghhh…I swear sometimes it feels like there’s more than just one person living there..now don’t get me wrong its not dirty by anymeans..its jus cluttered wit school papers, lesson plans, mail, worksheets, and a bunch of other rah rah rah..soon as I get n today im putting a hurt on that house..turn on that good music and change clothes and put n some work.

I recently had a talk with a good friend that I felt was losing a connection with….felt like he was purposely doing things without an invitation or intentionally jus being phony..well turns out that wasn’t the case but I still had to talk to him bout it..cuz if I hadn’t I would blew the hell up at any given drunken moment lol. My friends r like my fam..we gonna fight, we gonna get on each other’s nerves, but at the end of the day we’re there for each other…with/without an invitation

Im sittin here at 2:08 pm in a extra class they stuck me wit last week tryin to focus and not fall asleep wit these kids looking at me lol…ive taken the gym kids that couldn’t participate and brought them to the art room…they got something to write and ive been doin this post…aww shit the bell rang…gotta run..anybody doin anything fun/interesting this weekend???? Lemme know ill b bored lol
(OK OK OK I know its sunday now but i didnt get a chance to post on friday lol)

Hey Hey Hey

2009-10-27T20:55:00.002-04:00

Wassup blogworld…I know its been a min..and ive been sayin I was gonna get back to my blog but yall know how things can get at times lol….and I blame Twitter for part of it lol….Well im not gonna make this a long post…ya know I gotta save some things for later posts lol.

Well I jus wanna say that God is good in case yall didn’t know..as of July 30, 2009 I officially became a home owner!!!! It’s a 2 bedroom 2.5 bathroom, finished basement, deck, fireplace and other rah rah rah lol. It was a bit touch and go there for a while and it looked like I wasn’t gonna get it but when it’s meant to be it will be. For those that remember my first search for a home didn’t go to well and I prayed on it then and trusted God to allow things to fall into place for when the time was right…and although there were times when I wanted to cry, scream, break things etc. it was made official when I signed the dotted line…Gotta say thanx to everyone who helped me make the move cuz lawdy knows I had a house worth of crap n that apt lol.

My job…ughhhh…yeah ill get to that in another post lol..but lets jus say they moved me to another building working with a different level of kids..yeah..wasn’t too thrilled bout that lol.

This past sat I had my pre birthday party and I honestly had a damn blast…thanx to everyone that came out Promiscious X, Fuzzy ShawnQT Kalisha, Elisha, my Twin, Cuban boy, Steven, Scooter, Torree, Willie, Greg , and a bunch of other folks…I think there was anywhere between 25-40 people there lol...if i forgot to shout u out charge it to my head and not my heart...And yall know I cooked my entire ass off for that party lol..made 2 pans of potato salad, 2 pans of mac and cheese, 3 pans of Brandy Honey BBQ strips, 2 pans of sautéed veggies, about 7 gallons of Get Rite Juice (and trust me it will get u rite lol) there were deviled eggs, and a bangin ass cake..i didn’t make those tho lol. Well I had a great time until the next morning when I realized that someone had made off wit my digital cam and my boy’s 2 cell phones…I mean really we come into someones house and take something..how trashy, tacky, and uncalled for..fuckin niggas I tell ya ::takes breath and sips wine:: ok im calm now..a lil..but like I said had a good time other than the theft and havin to clean up after the drunken boy who decided to mix Henny and vodka..once again..who does that?!?!? And then wonder y they cant remember shit the next day lol…I wish I could show yall the pics but….

Antyway…I jus wanted to give yall a quick update as to some of the things that have been goin on…so now I will pour myself another glass of wine and prepare for midnite which officially marks my bday..10/28 people…gotta luv a scorpio rite lol…Ill try to update this thang more frequently..but if u wanna know wut the hell im doin or goin thru follow me on twitter…Twin_vision…until the next time.

Sometimes I Wanna Black...

2009-05-21T15:33:00.000-04:00

Hey blog world,

Sometimes I wonder if people could really take it if I truly went the hell off...I mean I usually say wuts on my mind, to a certain extent anyway, but I usually tone things down a bit. I'm the type that tries to say wut I mean and mean wut I say but at the same time I don't wanna come across too harsh, abrassive, or down right evil..cuz trust me I can be that way a times. So I try to dillute my actual thoughts to come across as civil but at the same time make a point.

In doing all of this dilluting and watering down, sometimes I feel like the tru meaning of my message may get lost and the acutal "fury" that I wanna get across jus doesn't. And where does that leave me????? most likely back at square one. Guess I'm trying to spare people's feelings.

Cuz I feel if I truly jus exploded like I want to, and trust me I've been fightin the urge to do it, I might loose some friends, my job, family members, and probably some other things. But friends are supposed to be there and accept wut u have to say regardless right??? But I don't think that would be the case...cuz like I said, if I truly went the hell off and told people about themselves, or what I actually thought about the way they handled their affairs, or how they've wronged me, or bout their empty or broken promises, or about being let down, or about their bitchassness (thought I would never use that word lol), or their lies, or whatever else it may be, I think I would come across as that EVIL, MALICIOUS, BLACK-HEARTED SCORPIO....but ummm maybe that's wut I need to do (jus a thought).

Maybe its the luv I have for these people that keeps me from goin off and havin a Madea moment
...hmmm jus a thought..wut do yall think???

Over the weekend...

2009-05-18T20:27:00.006-04:00

Hey blogworld,

Hope everyone had a good time over the weekend and is ready to tackle another work week..ugghhhh lol...well I had a pretty decent and busy weekend...

I was told earlier last week not to make any plans for fri nite..ummm ok sure..come to find out my friends put together a lil nite out to celebrate my graduation since I was outta town for the official graduation...THANX GUYS!!!!! Well needless to say I was shocked and happy bout everything....well we went to the city to eat at Caliente Cab in the village, which is someplace that I've been wanting to go to for a while but never actually made it there...so I was souped as hell bout eathin there...wish someone woulda told us the drinks were between $14-$16 each but they were good

the place had no damn light..we were usin candles and cell phones to read the menus lol

yeah the drinks were good..wut can i say lol

yeah the drinks were settin in lol

So after dinner we hit a club and we danced the damn nite away but my genius ass left the cam in the car lol...my feet were killin me by the end of the night lol...on sat i hit up a friend's housewarming and had a good time..didn't know Taboo could get so intense..had the people livin downstairs bangin on the ceilin cuz we were making too much noise lol.

Sun went to Fuzzy's housewarmin....awww im iz b so proud of him and stuffisis....him iz gettin his grown man on...damn that chicken was good..u did ur thing fuzz buzz..and once again I found out how serious Taboo can get..especially when ur drinkin lol...well anyway my weekend was good...i needed it...once again jus wanted THANX to the crew for a great fri...hope everyone enjoyed their weekend

Before and After..and still in progress lol

2009-05-15T18:22:00.004-04:00

Hey blogworld..hope everything is good wit everyone...I'm still tryin to maintain over here..if it aint one thing it's another u know??? Had a minor break down not too long ago but i think im back to normal (well wuteva normal is for me lol) Now don't start call the people to take me to the place where they give u those hug urself jackets cuz i didn't have a break down and go crazy lol..it was jus one of those times when that positive, happy go lucky, im good, la la la mask cracks and reality sets in for a min...it was like I was jus not happy for a bunch of different reasons...house hunt, professional life, love life, gym life, bills, car...dammit it was hittin hard...ahhh well thas life at times rite??? Jus wanted to pop on and say wassup...oh yeah check out the pics..i was like daaammmnnn lol

Heres my college graduation pic from 2005...y didn't anyone tell me to put down the fork lol

And here's my grad pic from 2009

Is there a big difference???? Im still workin on it though..until next time..stay up..oh yeah if u haven't done it yet follow me on twitter..twitter.com/twin_vision

I Finally Did IT!!!!!

2009-05-03T11:27:00.019-04:00

I MADE IT...FINALLY

Hey yall,

I know its been a min but ive had to get it together right quick in prepartion for this weekend. Well...thurs i was runnin around like a chicken wit his head cut off tryin to get everything together cuz I had to head to my mom's house thurs night....well in between work, gettin my hair cut, finishing all my school work, laundry, tryin to find somethin to eat, then drivin a hour to my mom's house at like 11...yeah i was tired...well I was up on friday at 5am to head to Phila airport wit my moms to board and fly the hell out. This is how I looked at 5 somethin am

5 hours later and I was able to see

Well after landing and fightin to get the luggage and finding the car rental spot and rah rah rah...we got this car to ride around in for the weekend

Hop in the ride and head to the hotel...

Yeah...so fri was pretty much a chill day...went to some mexican restaurant wit moms...

Sat was the big day..woke up and went to breakfast then chilled out till it was time for the main event...

Mom was sooooo proud and happy..she kept smilin and stuffisis lol...

We went out to eat after that and I kinda passed out when we got back to the hotel..guess i was dehydrated from the heat and boredom or whatever but I slept the entire day lol...sunday we headed back to the east coast and i couldn't have been happier lol

This was the church of the people of phoenix..it was closed on sunday and folks acted was feenin for it..im talkin bout cussin the store out cuz it was closed...tragedy

Overall it was an ok trip..woulda been better if i was able to go there wit some friends instead of my mom..i mean really..who's gonna go clubbin wit their mom???? not meeeeeeeeee!!!!!!! But she wanted to take me out there for the big day and who was I to say no (even though i tried lol)...well blogworld I officially have my Masters degree in Education Administration...its been a long time comin but thanx to God, a supportive mother, and my friends aka fam (X, Kalisha, Shawn, Fuzzy, my Twin, and if i forgot u, charge it to my head and not my heart) I MADE IT!!!!!!!
(P.S. All my Twitter-land folks follow me at twin_vision on twitter)

I jus had to

2009-04-25T02:00:00.001-04:00

Ok so I jus saw this like 2.5 sec ago and I had to share it wit yall..i was a lil tipsy watchin this..ok im a lil tipsy now lol..but i hope yall get a kick outta this like i did

I Had To Laugh!!!!!

2009-04-17T16:42:00.002-04:00

I had to share this wit yall....So earlier today I was in one of my high school classes and I was giving them a break since I've been working them like fugitive slaves tryin to buy their freedom and two of my students came to me and said they had somethin to show me

Student 1: U tell him

Student 2: No u do it

Me: Hellurrrr...wut iz yall b talkin bout

Student 1: Ummm...We were thinkin about who u reminded us of the other day

Me: Oh really the other day...hmmmm....and who is it

Student 2: U can't be madd at us but I think your gonna laugh anyway

Me: (enter church hum)

Student 2: U not gonna be madd

Student 1: Jus show him

Me: Wont yall jus hurry up and sat down so I can finish wut I'm doing

Student 2: Ok (pulls out phone)

Student 1: This is who it is...remember u can't be madd

Me: (holds breath to stop from laughin in their faces) Ok

Why did these fools show me this video on a cell phone.....

I laughed sooooo hard cuz this isn't the first time I've heard this....the other day a parent heard me goin off on a student and she said thas wut these kids need...some discipline and guidance..u jus like Madea...my mouth hit the floor then and my ass hit the floow this time cuz i lauged myself out the damn chair...gotta luv the kids lol

Hey Hey Hey...

2009-04-13T20:45:00.001-04:00

Wassup people…jus wanted to come and check in wit yall for a brief min while I have the time. I know its been a while since a post from me..im sorry lol...The past few weeks my life has become hectic..like usual right lol. Its like I damn near don't have time to jus sit back and reflect at times ugghhh lol Well….work has been..ummm..hmmm…yeaaaahhhhh work ::sigh:: well work is work..administration is still the biggest pain n my ass ever created in the history of education….im telling yall they do some of the dumbest things…like putting the school on lockdown for two days because of some graffiti that was on the wall….mind u it wasn’t the first time this has happened but for some unknown reason they thought a lockdown would make things right…yeaahhhh no

Speakin of administration, Im n my last class for grad school. If ive never mentioned it before im working on my MA in Education Administration and im in the final stretch. Im currently in the 6th week of the 8 week internship so I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Thank God I’ve been able to survive and maintain damn near a 4.0..don’t know how I did it cuz there were sometimes I wanted to bash my head against the wall lol. But thanx to the Lawd, Momma, and the Crew I managed to pull it thru. Like I said im doin my internship now and I guess administration at my school forgot that I was still a teacher cuz they keep piling more and more stuff on me to do. I know I have to get a certain number of professional development administrative hours but daaaaammmm…how the hell am I supposed to do the job of 3 other people in addition to teaching a crazy ass schedule?!?!?!? Oh well imma do the damn thing lol.

So in another couple of weeks I will be traveling out to Arizona (and no I don’t attend University of Phoenix lol) wit moms to graduate…not really excited about it though cuz who really wants to travel across the country wit ur mom…damn wish I had a boo for times like these lol…oh well ::sigh:: But I know yall thinking “Damn Twin, y don’t u wanna go for graduation?” Well..lemme tell ya….its gonna b hot as hell in Arizona and graduation is long as hell…its not like moms is gonna go clubbin wit me after graduation..now we may hit a few bars or something but thas bout it for me and moms lol…oh well Im really jus goin out there for her..cuz she wants to see her son graduate wit his second degree….Im soooo takin pics and I plan on bein drunk during the ceremony…imma have me a flask of Get Rite Juice lol….did I mention that it’s a Christian school lol..yeah didn’t find that out till I was like 4 classes in.

Hope all is well wit yall..jus wanted to check in wit everybody and let yall know im still alive lol..ill b postin more once life gets back to normal…hopefully lol.

The Baby Shower Stole My Life....

2009-03-20T17:52:00.008-04:00

Hey people…my life has been a bit hectic and the job/internship is kickin my ass lol…but I had to tell yall bout this…jus know I miss yall….well here we go…

The baby shower that stole my life…yeah I know yall r thinking..wut n the hell right????? Well lemme tell u how it all happened…I went to a baby shower last sunday for a friend of a friend…and boy was it an adventure…well it was supposed to start at 2:30 so I get there at 2:45 expecting things to have started already…yeah no..there was nobody there but my friend and a few of the momma to be’s family members..yeah so I was told that her brother’s were gay but nobody told me/warned me bout the brothers...

::rubs temples and takes a deep breath:: Ok so I walk in and see these two girls sashayin around wit balloons and ribbons and wut not tryin to set up…yeah upon closer inspection I found out that those were her brothers…wtf…I mean hair down to their shoulders..size zero..skinty jeans…piercings…fitted jackets…mini shirts…y didn’t anybody tell me that these were lipgloss wearin, gum poppin, head twilrin, eye rollin, kit kat purr., duck walkin, “Ohhhh thas my shit girl im bout to cut loose,” shwamin girls…to each his own but I sooo wasn’t expectin to see that at the baby shower
::shakes head and sighs::

Like I said I got there around 2:45 and nobody was there…so after helping them finish the last min decorations and laughin at the “girls” my friend and I sit at the bar for our first drink of the afternoon….mind u we hadn’t eaten cuz we were waiting for everyone else to show up…yeah my first drink was a Godfather (Johnny Walker blk and red and amaretto) Who n the hell told me to get that for my first drink..which was shortly followed by a Tokyo Tea…yeah I started feelin my liquor real early..can we say drinkin on an empty stomach

Folks started to show around 3:45 and by then my friend and I were nice as hell. She was laughin at everything and jus buggin the hell out…and I was right along wit her lol. Well the baby shower was fine…until around the 4th drink cuz the bartender was tryin to kill us lol.
By then I was seeing double and my friend was walkin into stuff and was slurring on the mic lol.

I left the shower around 6:30 and got in my car…had to sober up right quick to drive around the corner back home. Sat in the car and went to check my driver side mirror to check traffic and noticed that the mirror wasn’t there..WUT N THE HELL!!!! But all I could do was laugh bout it…thanx to the liquor…I called my friend and sang the “Where did my mirror go” song and we were crackin up the whole time it took for me to get home (5mins lol).

Soooo I got n the house at like 6:45…took my shoes off…sat on the couch…and the next thing I knew I was opening my eyes…and I was in my bed…I’m thinking when the hell did I get in the bed…so I look at the clock and it says 7:10…so I say to myself, “Cool it’s still Sunday and it’s only 7:10..guess I must’ve decided to take a nap.” I go to turn on the tv and the damn man on tv says “Good Monday morning America!!!!” Wut the hell..the damn baby shower stole my Sunday…so after throwin a 5 min temper tantrum (im talking bout feet kickin…arms thrashin..rollin around the bed) I gets up, takes a shower, and stumble my way to work…talk bout a hangover lol…I didn’t get my life together till 4th period lol..soooo im filing a police report cuz the babyshower stole my Sunday.

Over the weekend...

2009-03-02T12:12:00.005-05:00

Wassup people…hope everyone had a good weekend and enjoyed some time to jus breathe…cuz lawd knows my week/weekend was anything but relaxin lol…well it all started last week when my sister called and told me that she was havin her bday party on sat at some place in south jersey…like 2 hours from me…and the name of the place was La Vagina or some rah rah like that and that it was gonna be a grown and sexy type thing (meaning new outfit cuz all my dress clothes are too big now ::pats self on back and puts the cookie down::)…anyway I told her I was gonna come (not like she gave me a choice…chick basically threatened me thru the phone) so I knew I had to get my school work outta the way ahead of time

Yeah…..school work…who told my professor to give us like a bajillion assignments the last week of the class…had to do 2 discussion questions, respond to at least 3, do a group project, write a paper, and do the final journal…also had to “do” 3 classroom observations..know yall know I aint do them observations and sat here and made them up lol…hell the prof wont know..and if they do…oh well..KRAD…so yeah my week was pretty much devoted to school work, reg work, and good ol jury duty..wut n the.. (eyes bulge, veins pop…HULK SMASH!!!!!)

(regains composure) Ok so as I was sayin…I wake up on sat and get my life together to travel to my sis thing…I get off the turnpike at exit 3 and if any of yall know bout the NJ Turnpike exits after 7 are like 100 miles apart ugghhhh …so I get off the exit and wait for my sis to get to the meeting point…well she gets there and tells me that we gotta drive to philly to drop her car off for her husband for when his plane lands…so after an additional half hour of driving we get to philly, drop the car off, and turn around to head back to jersey to find the hotel…but before we do that I had to eat so we went to Olive Garden…mmmm salad and breadsticks ::wipes drool from mouth:: After a nice lunch we go and find the hotel..check in..and I start typin my paper (sidenote..i always write my papers first then type them later..and I was drinkin while I was writing this one so if u though I was gonna even attempt to type it…)

So yeah….paper’s done..showered..dressed and looking fresh…we head to the Vagina place for the party..we get there and she was happy that she got the largest party room (the place aint that big though hmmmm) we had a personal waitress…who really made us wait for drinks..so I was jus orderin 2 drinks at a time lol…but someone answer me this…how the hell can u have a bar that doesn’t have Bacardi O, Limon, Peach..or half the other shit???? Yall know I had to go have a talk wit the bartender and give them a quick lesson…even taught her how to make a Fire Island (thanx Chicago) jus for me…so we drank, ate, and danced the night away.

Ok so a friend of my sister’s friend apparently had a crush on me and was following me around the whole night…think I may have said bout 10 words to him..u know jus bein polite and stuffisis…but damn homie can I get some room…and y is his ass in like every pic I took (pics will be up later) Ugghhhhh….overall I had a pretty good time other than the fact that I was missin the crew…the first party I missed ::sigh:: oh well we gonna have to have another one so I can be there lol

Wut yall do for the weekend? Share ur stories..make me laugh..cuz I’m sittin here looking at the snow and jus thinking to myself….

My Sister's Party

2009-03-01T21:20:00.025-05:00

Here are some of the pics from my sister's party last week....

check out my sis

I was feelin myself that night...oh well lol

Yeah i did a costume change...so wut lol

wut am i lookin at?

oh yeah...this

yeah..so y was this guy follwing me around the club...he was a friend of my sister's friend...but damn homie

Blessing Or Curse

2009-02-19T19:08:00.012-05:00

Love - Keisha cole

I was talking with a friend the other day and the topic of love came up. In our discussion this comment was made….”Love is like 2 edged sword. It can be the source of great joy, yet the source of great pain. Think bout it love songs can make u happy or sad dependin on your experience.

This got me to thinking..and yall know how much of that I do lol…there’s so much truth in that comment. Love is truly something that has caused me to feel like im on cloud 9 and above but it has also caused me to feel like im cloud 0 is so far above me. Love has caused me to smile to myself..feel like life is good and it can’t get no betta. It’s caused me to lose sleep, not eat, cry and rock myself for comfort…im talking bout that cryin when ur eyes and nose are leakin, lips quivering, wantin ur mommy type of cry lol
…shut up..yall know u’ve been there before lol…but I know if it wasn’t for the bad experiences wit love I wouldn’t know how to appreciate it

Love is something that we all desire but are we truly ready for it? Love is something that grows and develops over time..it should get deeper and more meaningful as time progresses. I’ve had that type of love before…when my every thought is on that other person…when I jus wanna b wit them…when the conversation is so easy and caring is second nature….the long talks, the helping hand, the little things that mean so much….when u and that other person jus wanna be there for each other in everyway possible…when u jus wanna shout out that u love whoever it is…and they feel the same way bout u as u do for them

I miss that

So my fellow bloggers…wut do u think? Is love a blessing, a curse, or a lil of both? Does the bad make u appreciate the good? Are you ready for everything that comes along with it?

Nothin really...jus an update

2009-02-11T00:46:00.009-05:00

Wassup people…feels like its been a min since I wrote anything on here but hey..sometimes its like that lol….there really hasn’t been anything new happening on my end so im jus gonna give yall a few updates/thoughts that have been goin on.

Well im STILL stuck in jury duty..ugghhh…but it’s getting a lil better..im able to stay awake a lil longer everytime lol..but trust and believe the sandman still comes and visits me during the long drawn out rah rah rah that goes on…but hey its almost over..jus gotta last for a few more wed. and fri. till mach 6th…that not too far from now right??? Right??? Will somebody agree wit me..hell lie for that matter lol

Work’s actually getting a lil better..haven’t had to cuss anybody out (other than a couple students). My troll of a principal actually asked me to be the tech coordinator for the new school next year in addition to teachin Spanish…sounds great right??? One problem though….who n the hell told her I knew enough about tech/computer/networking and all that other rah rah to be the coordinator..but lemme tell yall..if the position comes with a big enough raise my ass will be reading the Tech/Computer/Networking and all that Other Rah Rah For Dummies book lol

Kicked up the workout routine and that other health crap and my body is def doin some changing…and im lovin it..finally…body fat is down..getting all solid..chest is doin its own thing..legs r tighter..yeah im more motivated now than anything..the only thing I hate is that muscle weighs more than fat…so as the waist line goes down there’s a possibility that the scale may go up…talk about tragic irony lol

Love life is still the same….non existent lol…it’s a damn tragedy but hey….when the time is right it’ll happen right. Thought I had met someone wit the possibility for potential but guess I thought wrong. Oh well…life goes on..jus gotta stay positive and happy…can’t be depressed over things u can’t change right??? Damn did I jus say that (Shut up u 2….u know who u r lol)

Valentines day is damn near tomorrow and it’s a time of year im not looking too forward to…its like the universe’s way of making sure u know ur single..in case u forgot lol. Last year this time I had boyfriend (mind u we broke up like a week later) but due to his work schedule we didn’t get to spend it together…and before him I was with my previous ex for 3 years..and honestly I can’t remember having a V-day that I found special….oh well one day it’ll happen cuz I know im a good man who deserves to be loved and treated in the same way that I treat others DAMMIT!!!!!

Ok enough bout all that cuz if I keep goin imma end up hurtin someone lol…anywhooooo overall I’m feelin pretty good…ive reconnected wit old friends, strengthened current friendships, and I’m almost finished grad school….im gonna keep this positive energy im feeling for as long as possible but I know when I’m feelin down I got those faithful few around me to help pick me up and get me back on the right path again

Wut time is it???

2009-01-27T19:20:00.005-05:00

Ecclesiastes 3
1To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

2A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

3A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

4A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

5A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

6A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

7A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

8A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

The Word has already been blessed but may the Lord add a blessing to the readers of His word.

Ok now outta church boy mode lol...but before i do..do u remember these:

oh choir days lol

These verses of Ecclesiates have always caused me to think. Growing up in the church, it was not uncommon for me to jus pick up the Bible (King James Version) and just read...sometimes when pastor was preachin cuz I didn't wanna listen lol....well these versus have always stuck in my mind. It makes me wonder wut time is it for me..cuz like verse one says "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. Kinda makes those sayings like "All good things in time...and good things come to those who wait...and This too shall pass" a lil clearer right? Cuz to every time there is a purpose and to everything a season. I'm pretty sure most of us have been in situations and wondered wut the point/purpose of it was or how long it would last. I wonder wut time it is for me and wuts the purpose of this time? I try to remember that the Lord doesn't put more on us than we can bear..and that I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me..somebody cue the organ and the choir lol

When songs speak do u listen???

2009-01-22T23:38:00.002-05:00

Hey people…have u ever noticed when a song speaks to you??? When some artist has expressed exactly how you’ve felt at some moment…of course you have lol…Recently I’ve been listening to the lyrics of some songs and I’m telling you these artists have been speakin to me…When I first got Beyonce’s CD I really jus listened to the singles and the beats of the other songs lol…hell Single Ladies and Diva were/are the shit lol…well about a week or so ago I actually started listening to the lyrics to the last track on Sasha Fierce…Scared of Lonely…when I heard wut B was sayin it was like she had been in my mind/heart when I was going through some issues…and in some cases I feel this song can still apply. Most likely I’ll do a couple more posts similar to this cuz like I said…some songs have been speaking to me…and I may give you the background story about my experiences and these songs. Well here are the lyrics for those of you who don’t know them. Does this song speak to you in anyway? Cuz I know it sure spoke to me lol...if not wut songs have spoken to u?

Scared Of Lonely - Beyoncé

Lyrics to Scared Of Lonely :
I'm in this fight, and I'm swinging and my arms are getting tired
It's hard, I'm trying to beat this emptiness but I'm running out of time
I'm sinking in the sand, and I can barely stand
I'm lost in this dream, I need you to hold me
I'm scared of lonely
I try to be patient, but I'm hurting deep inside
And I can't keep waiting, I need comfort late at night
And I can't find my way, won't you lead me home
Cause I'm lost in this dream, I need you to hold me

I'm scared of lonely
And I'm scared of being the only shadow I see along the wall
And I'm scared the only heartbeat I hear beating is my own
And I'm scared of being alone
I can't seem to breathe when I am lost in this dream, I need you to hold me
I'm scared of lonely
I'm scared of lonely.....

I cry at night, 'cause my baby's too far to be by my side
To wipe away these tears of mine, so I hold my pillow tight
To imagine you would stretch your hand looking for mine
'Cause I'm lost in this dream , I need you to hold me

I'm scared of lonely
And I'm scared of being the only shadow I see along the wall
And I'm scared the only heartbeat I hear beating is my own
And I'm scared of being alone
I can't seem to breathe when I am lost in this dream, I need you to hold me

I need your strength when nobody is around
'Cause I'm tired of this emptiness, I think I'm drowning
I can't be lonely no more
Cause I'm lost in this dream, I need you to hold me

I'm scared of lonely
And I'm scared of being the only shadow I see along the wall
And I'm scared the only heartbeat I hear beating is my own
And I'm scared of being alone
I can't seem to breathe when I am lost in this dream, I need you to hold me
I'm scared of lonely
I'm scared of lonely.....

Jury Duty..not that bad...still not good

2009-01-22T22:43:00.006-05:00

Wassup people…thanx for all the jury duty support lol….jury duty is…ummmm….hmmmm….a pain in the ass…u know its bad when id rather be at working teachin the baybay kids lol. I gotta go back in tomorrow for the fourth session…after tomorrow only 11 more to go…oh joy. But honestly it’s not as bad as I thought it would be…now that doesn’t mean it’s good..jus not as bad as I thought. There are some pretty interesting people there but they’re all boring and have no sense of humor. Yall know im a fool and I like to laugh and joke…but these people are dull as hell. I try to get a laugh outta them and they look at me like I got 3 arms and two heads..don’t these people see me tryin to make this shit interesting so I’ll stay awake…don’t interrupt…rude (thanx Bonquiqui lol)

Anyway I sit in the back of the “Grand Jury Room” (doesn’t that sound so important lol) so I can see everybody. Its funny watchin people act like they’re payin attention when they’re really asleep wit their eyes open. They need to be like me and post up and take it down. When shit gets boring my ADD kicks in and I’m all over the place lol. Im textin, drawin, throwin stuff at people to make them think they’re goin crazy lol.

I wish yall could see how I act in there. Ugggggghhhhhh….all I know is that this damn injustice system betta not call on my black ass to do no more damn jury duty….I gotta work on my excuses to get me outta this crap.

They told us when we first started that we are scheduled to be there from 9-4 but if we finish early or there’s only a few cases we can leave early. Last Friday we were lucky to get out at like 12:30 so when we went back on Wed. I jus knew my ass was getting out early again…yeah they had something for my ass…we didn’t get outta there until like 4:40..which meant I got stuck in traffic and didn’t get to the gym till like 6…im soooo over this..all I know is that I hope the gods of jury duty smile on us tomorrow and I get outta there before 3…I got things to do lol.

Jury Duty....Wut In The???

2009-01-15T21:59:00.004-05:00

So the right before thanksgiving I get my first jury duty summons in the mail…I’ve never done it before but I’ve heard the horror stories about it so I wasn’t even tryin to do it…so I look on the piece of devil mail for the excuse section and they have the nerve to list the excuses that you can use. So I copy down the excuse that worked for me…it said something like “I am a teacher in a K-12 public educational institution.” So I’m thinking….they can’t have me come to court when it’s durin the regular school year right??? They know that the kids needs theys edujamacation right. So I had smile on my face as I put the devil mail back in the mailbox.

The summons said that if you don’t hear from them then ur excuse was accepted so yall know I wasn’t looking for a letter or a phone call from them. Cuz I jus knew that since sent my letter back so they would leave me alone. Yeaaahhh no…yall know these jerks sent me a letter in all caps…like Satan himself was speakin YOUR REQUEST HAS BEEN DENIED YOU WILL REPORT ON JAN 14TH AT 8:45….so yall know I was pissed about that….wut in the damn injustice system….not only did they deny my request but then had the nerve to tell me when to show up.

So I had to put a master plan into effect of how to get outta it….well I knew that every excuse I thought of wouldn’t work…so I show up yesterday morning and there were like 75 people there..I heard they only needed 23 jurors so I jus knew I was gonna get picked…yeaaaahhhh no..yall know I was the fourth person called to be a juror…I damn near cried when they called my name….uggghhhh

So for those of u who have had jury duty before know the part when the judge asks u a bunch of questions to see if you can actually serve….well I raised my hand a couple of times and the judge said he wanted to see me for a sidebar convo….so after talking to him and tryin to figure out how I can get this man to let me off the hook…I ended up telling him that I hated the cops lol..I wish yall coulda seen his face….how the hell did I tell Your Honor that I hated cops while I was surrounded by the police…lol…I jus knew that would get me outta jury duty….yeaaaaahhh noooooo..they told me to sit my black ass back wit the rest of the jurors.

So after being picked to serve as a grand juror (oh joy) they put us thru orientation and I swear the many wouldn’t shut the hell up…how the hell can I fall asleep and wake up and his ass was still talking…ummmm helloooooo….SHUT THE HELL UP MAN!!!!!!!!!! They told us that we would have to serve jury duty every wed and fri from 9-4 until march 6th….wut the hell kinda devil work is this…don’t they understand that I’m a teacher and if im not in school the kids don’t learn..if the kids don’t learn they can’t pass the tests..if they fail the district looks at me….can we say bullshit….im telling u it’s the injustice system….I have a feeling that Imma have some stories for yall from this bullshit…pray for me...case dismissed lol

Vodka.....Too Good Not To Share....

2009-01-14T00:09:00.015-05:00

Hey yall...my momma sent me this and I had to share lol

Definitely a waste of good Vodka………
Who knew?!!!!
1. To remove a bandage painlessly,

saturate the bandage with vodka.
The stuff dissolves adhesive.

2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers,
fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking,
let set five minutes and wash clean.

The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew.

3. To clean your eyeglasses,

simply wipe the lenses with a soft,
clean cloth dampened with vodka.
The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and kills germs.

4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka
and letting your safety razor blade
soak in the alcohol after shaving.

The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.

5. Spray vodka on wine stains,

scrub with a brush, and then blot dry.

6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face

as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores.

7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo.

The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair,
and stimulates the growth of healthy hair.

8. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle with vodka

and spray bees or wasps to kill them.

9 Pour one-half cup vodka

and one-half cup water into a Ziploc freezer bag

and freeze for a slushy, refreshing ice pack for aches,
pain or black eyes.

10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar
with freshly packed lavender flowers,

fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly
and set in the sun for three days.
Strain liquid through a coffee filter,
then apply the tincture to aches and pains.

11. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth

to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment.

12. To cure foot odor,

wash your feet with vodka.

13 Vodka will disinfect

and alleviate a jellyfish sting.

14. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy

to remove the urushiol oil from your skin.

15. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth.

Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain.

And silly me!
I've only been drinking the stuff.

Work, Brunch, & Weekend

2009-01-09T14:56:00.010-05:00

Wassup people…the weekend is finally here..didn’t think I could make it cuz these kids were clearly outta control this week. The first week after vacation is always a bit hectic but this week they was outta control…like they got a case of ADD for Christmas…ugghhh. Well vacation is over, school started, and grad school is back in effect. I think this class isn’t gonna be that bad..its a ESL class and so far its cool. The first paper we have to do only has to be about 500 words which aint shit compared to my last few classes where every paper had to be at least 1250 words.

Been fightin a cold this week and ive been putting up a good fight lol. Started feelin a lil sick the day after the brunch and ive been drinkin my juices and takin my vitamins and restin. I miss the gym…kinda lol. Been comin home everyday, watchin Charmed, Law & Order, takin a shower, and putting my ass on the couch. I know when I get back in the gym I’m gonna be dyin but I’ll get thru it..might pass out on the elliptical but it’ll b worth it.

Had the brunch last week and unfortunately I don’t have any pictures of it. But lemme tell yall I COOKED MY ASS OFF!!!!!! My brunches start off as breakfast food and then transform into dinner later in the day. I cooked the dinner food Friday night so on sat morn all I would have to do is the breakfast food and warm up the dinner food. Well the menu consisted of holiday style cinnamin-raisin French toast, holiday style regular French toast, eggs, grits, turkey bacon, sweet turkey sausage, homefries, scrapple, turkey kielbasa …and for dinner I made a pan of lasagna, another pan of pasta with ground turkey and spicy turkey sausage, collard greens, fresh green beans, my secret cabinet chicken, a pan of brandy honey-bbq wings, garlic, herb, and cheddar mashed potatoes, and a corn puddin. I was gonna do some homemade cookies and pies but by the end of that I was tired lol.

Now yall know I had to have some drinks to go along wit the food. Started off with some homemade sangria…then after that I made some Get Rite, then mad a couple different versions of sangria..the strawberry one was rockin lol….then I made some strawberry margaritas.

I had a really good time buggin out wit my friends. This was something I started doing with my family when I was younger and started doing it myself about two years ago. Since my friends are my family this is jus my way of doing a lil something for them. I LUV U GUYS!!!!!! Now if people’s cars didn’t get towed it would’ve been a better night. Imagine my havin to sober up to take people to get their cars lol.

It’s supposed to snow some more here over the weekend so im gonna hit the liquor store and shop rite after I get my hair cut. If imma be snowed in I wanna be able to stay toasty wit a drink lol. Goin to a bday party tonight and writin that damn paper but that’s pretty much it so far…Wut yall got planned for the weekend?

New Years....

2009-01-06T13:27:00.006-05:00

(Wrote this over the break...posting in now...shut up Fuzzy) Happy new year people...hope everyone enjoyed themselves..I wasn't sure wut I was gonna do to bring n the new year up until the day lol...I had heard about a few parties and club but I wasn't sure...didn't really feel like being bothered wit the club scene so the house parties sounded like the best bet.

Well prior to me makin up my mind I was cleaning and my brother calls ...now I haven't heard from him n like 2 weeks (cuz he got a new or should I say another boo) so I was skeptical about answering...but I did and he says "wassup..r u busy?" So im thinkin bout sayin I was but instead I entertained him and said I wasn't...then he asks me to do him a favor...so now im thinkin...here we go...he goes on to ask me to take him to the hospital cuz he has an absess...so im like ok thinkin his ass was at home...nah this nigga wanna b at work...so I had to pick him up from work, take him home to get his id, then take him to the hospital. Yall know I was over the bullshit halfway thru this lil adventure. Like he didn't realize his face was swollen like somebody put a grapefruit on his jawbone before he went to work...so being the nice guy I am I leave my house and pick his ass up.

So after I drop his ass off at the hospital...I call shawn to see wut he had planned for new years and we decided to go to one of the parties we heard about...well it was a black affair so I had to make a phone call to get all the details...cuz if u thought I was getting all dipped up to go to a house party u thought wrong lol...turns out u could wear wutever...so I threw on some jeans and a black button up and a fitted and we hit the party.

Overall the party was pretty good...the invitation said there would be imported delicases...yeah since when were bbq chicken wings and rice considered imported lol...but the open bar was nice...everyone brought a bottle so there was plenty of liquor...even though they ran out of vodka and rum...grrrr

Did I mention there was a stripper....who was like 4 ft 1 and was rhythmcaly challenged...dude couldn't find the beat if u gave his ass a map, a gps, and a damn compass...but he was funny and real personable.

Overall it was a pretty good time...some people were dipped up..others looked like they didn't give a damn lol...but it was....ummm cute..yeah thas the right word lol. After we left the party we hit up IHOP and lawd yall shoulda seen the mess in there...why is it that people wit no front teeth always wanna smile and say all the words that require ur upper teeth to show???
Someone please explain that to me cuz I clearly don't get it lol...well my liquor caught up wit me n the restaurant and I kinda fell asleep at the table...oh well lol.

Got home around 6 somethin n the morn and passed out on the couch. When the clock struck midnight I sent out a few messages and phone calls to let those special to me know they were... yall know who u r...wouldve rather brung n the new year wit that special someone but oh well lol...overall I had a good time and Im hopin 09 is a better year for everyone...I might be postin a lil bit bout my new years thoughts…I hope yall enjoyed ur new years.

Holiday Recap

2009-01-05T14:41:00.002-05:00

Hey blogfam...I know its been a min..feels like I've been away from yall forever...i did a lil bit of writing but i didn't post anything over the break..well lemme give yall a quick recap of the holidays...well on christmas eve I went to my aunts house cuz it was the annual family brunch which is usually held at my moms...well this year they decided to do it at my aunts...so I get into town at like 12 and im wondering why nobody is home...so I call my mom and she tells me that this year they were startin the brunch at 4...ummm doesn't that make it dinner??? Well anyway I brought my laundry wit me so I was able to kill time doing that and makin a few drinks...yeah I was drinkin at like 12:30 oh well I needed it...trust me.

So the brunch/dinner kicks off at like 430 and by then my stomach was touchin my back...this year I didn't have to cook anything but I should've...y my aunt make instant mashed potatoes and tried to pass them off as real? Like I wouldn't know the difference..overall it was an ok time even though I had to cuss out a few cousins...they mustve forgotten I was grown and clearly don't have patience for foolishness.

After leavin there I came back home and ended up linkin up wit some friends and goin to a lil gathering...I made 2 punches jus so people don't say that u show up empty handed (side note: I always bring somethin to someone elses house but the people's house we went to make a big deal bout people not bringing stuff but they never bring anything to anyone elses house hmmm). Well needless to say my 2 punches were the first things gone...oh well....saw some people I haven't seen n a while and had a decent time overall.

I speant most of christmas home by myself...jus reflecting on my life and doing a lot of thinking...actually I've been doing a lot of that latley but thatll come n a later post lol...later that night I chilled wit some friends and watched a movie and brought my ass home...overall it was a pretty ok holiday.

Merry Chrismahannakwanzaka

2008-12-23T10:23:00.008-05:00

Happy holidays people...today is a short day at work thank the Lord...its a half day and the schedule is changed so I only teach a couple classes today instead of the full load lol...I think im startin to finally get into the holiday spirit...I know im a lil late getting into it but oh well lol...I was actually a lil depressed and saddened by this "special" time of year but thas life right...after talkin to a few people I realized I wasn't the only one who was feelin like this so I guess im not weird lol

We had our first official snow storm thingy on friday...they closed school but I had already called out cuz I wanted to finish my christmas shopping...I figured I would use a sick day and hit the malls and stores while evryone else was at work...so I called out thurs night for fri....but thanx to mother nature I didn't get docked for a day...but instead I ended up getting stuck in snow traffic lol..but I was finished shoppin by then.

The crazy thing is that when I got outta bed at 830 there wasn't a flake of snow in sight...but the shit started comin down at 9:47am and didn't stop till like 6...damn snow and ice everywhere...went to a party fri night and on the way home old man winter thought it would b funny to spin my car into the guard rail...im thankful I wasn't driving fast and I jus gotta replace a headlight.

Bugged out wit the crew on sat night...MY SHAWN asked me to make a lil somethin for his holiday party so I did...glad everyone liked it..nuttin special jus some veggies. Now I gotta plot on my annual brunch I have for my friends. I've started plannin the menu and have shared some ideas wit some friends..but we're still in a recession but yall know imma make it happen somehow. This is the second year I've done the brunch and I love doin it....my circle of friends has changed drastically since last year but its for the best...I got some tru, down to earth, ride or die, people around me....I hope I have enough room for everyone lol cuz people overheard me talkin bout the brunch and invited themselves lol
.

Im headin to mommas house on wed cuz thas when we have our fam brunch..im lookin forward to it cuz ill see some of my cousins I haven't seen since last christmas...damn jerks don't call anybody lol...and I don't even have to cook..jus gotta show up wit a new drink for the family...I might jus bring some get rite since they haven't had it yet lol
.

Don't know when imma be able to post again cuz yall know my computer has sars but imma try to post somethin during my vacation. Vacation officially starts at 12 somethin and I don't go back till jan 5....and thas the same time I go back to grad school...2 more classes to go yall I can't wait till im done...so im enjoyin a few weeks of not having to work, write lesson plans, or write a damn paper. I wonder wut this break will bring...hmmm..well I hope all yall enjoy ur holidays and all that rah rah...soooo merry chrismahannakwanzaakah to u and urs

Its that time again.....

2008-12-17T13:18:00.006-05:00

Its officially that time of the year again…the first official snow fell and kept falling..and stopped….and then fallin some more. I wish yall coulda seen those steroid-injected, overstuffed, muscle bound snowflakes. Got hit n the head wit a few and thought I had a damn concussion lol…and jus when I thought the snow was over it started falling.

Whenever I see snow I get flashbacks from my childhood about the fireplace. I used to always have the fire goin as a child. Sitting by the fireplace was one of those memories that will stick with me. It’s something bout sittin by the fireplace and jus chillin and enjoyin the time. There’s jus something about spending time with that special someone by the fireplace…jus talking, holding each other, coolin out, lookin into each other’s eyes, and enjoyin each other’s company (if only n my mind lol). Hell…a fireplace is a mandatory feature for my home.

The Christmas tree is finally up and it looks pretty good…still gotta put the candy canes on the tree. Theres still some lil things to take care of before I can officially enjoy the break….still gotta finish up the last bit of grad school work, do the mid-term notices for the students, plan the brunch, and of course Christmas shopping. This year im having a bit of technical difficulties in shopping…don’t know wut to get anybody lol..dammit…but ill figure it out. Wut yall got planned for the holidays?

Wut in the......

2008-12-08T14:14:00.008-05:00

Wassup people...feels like I've been gone for a min and guess its tru cuz I've been told by a few bloggers that its time to post again lol. Well this is gonna be a quick post..damn job got me workin like a fugative slave tryin to buy my own freedom…..Remember a while back I did a post about false advertising??? Well how bout this for a case of false advertising….

Lets talk about tops for min shall we...now y is it that more and more tops r posin/actin like bottoms. Now im not sayin anythin is wrong wit bein a either one but ummmm y would a top have only pics of his ass in his profile or page?? And im not jus talkin bout jus reg pics...im talkin bout full out posed, arched back, booty tooted, lips pouted, cakes greased action. Wut the hell is that shit about???

You wanna give this....

But ur really givin this

Dudes claim they're masculine but r wearin makeup...umm maybe its jus me but a dude wearin makeup aint masculine n the least bit...his lipgloss aint cool and def aint poppin...hot ass mess...eyebrows all snatched and threaded and plucked...ummm noooo waayyyy buddy!!!!

Like I said..im not sayin that being either a top or bottom is wrong…but sometimes I think that there’s a negative mental image, or connotation, or negative stereotype about being a bottom. Guess it’s the thought that all bottoms are feminine is the reason that most guys don’t fully claim being bottoms.

In my experiences the word bottom has been used as more of an insult or for comedic relief…example:

Guy 1: Shut up bitch
Guy 2: U damn bottom!!

I know thas prob not the best example to give but yall get the point lol…. I wonder how many guys prefer to be bottoms but will claim that they’re vers…or verse/bottoms instead of just embracing who they actually are…or embracing what they prefer. Hell…at least don’t claim ur a top when all ur pics look like an ad for Apple Bottoms/House of Dereon/Barbie.

From the desk of Twin...

2008-11-26T08:23:00.005-05:00

From the desk of Twin:
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!

Well tomorrow is thanksgiving and before we all leave work early and prepare to stuff ourselves beyond reason I jus wanted to say wut im thankful for.

Its funny how life for me has changed from last year. People I used to hang wit and talk to on a daily basis really aren't a part of my life anymore...guess they weren't tru friends right?? Well from those "friendships" I've learned and reevaluated different aspects of myself and those I consider friends. I tend to not use the term friend too often because a friend to me is someonw who is close to my heart. Someone I can truly be myself with and talk to about anything/everything. Someone I can trust...someone who doesn't mind dong the same offering the same as I do n out friendship.

With that being said...im truly thankful and grateful for the people n my life I consider friends...and yall know who yall r (The Crew lol). I've had some deep serious talks with each of u at different points...bugged out and laughed wit u...even created some new drinks and cooked while talkin bout...ummm...wutever we were talkin bout lol.

Each one of u has helped me become the person I am today. Someone who is more confident and comfortable with who they are...someone who now knows its ok to let the "wall" down at times and truly be urself. Soooo I jus wanted to say thank you for being there for me...thanx for the laughs...thanx for the hugs...thanx for the shoulder to lean (and at times cry) on...thanx for the words of encouragement ...thanx for trusting me...thanx for letting me trust u...thanx for helping me understand myself and become a better person...thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I have a strong feeling that the connections/friendships I've made are the ones that will stay with me throughout my life. I look forward to sharing many moment of my life wit yall...the ups and downs...the good and bad...shit that only we can laugh at...then laugh at everyone else cuz they have no idea wuts goin on lol. I luv yall....from the heart.

May God continue to bless, keep, protect, fortify each of u and strengthen our individual and collective bonds.

Enjoy ur thanksgiving my fellow bloggers.

Thoughts...Past & Present

2008-11-20T13:40:00.007-05:00

Wassup blogworld...this may be a lil long but this is a post that took some time to write lol...if u can make it to the end....congrats and comments are apprecated...well these past few weeks have been quite eventful..been feelin all types of ways different days...here's an update

Well work has been a pain n the ass as usual lol. How bout I was standin n front of the building at the end of the day wit my jacket and fitted on and the principal comes slinkin out her office (lemme make a point here...school was over) on her way out the door. I see shes lookin me up and down wit the look of utter disgust on..so me being my nice and kind self (Shut up!!!) I speak and say "Have a nice day and enjoy ur day off" Yall know wut this troll said??? "Mmmhmm u too" Then she asks the security guard that was sittin next to us to walk her to the door...after he does that he comes back and tells me that she was goin on about how unprofessional it was for me to have on a hat..and how I look like a student..and rah rah rah. Now normally I woulda jus ignored it but got to thinkin...this troll has the audacity to worry bout my hat when there are tons of other things for her to worry bout...like y I don't have a classroom...or y don't I have enough materials...or y do kids skip class and nothin happens to them.

So I jus thought and kept it to myself....that is until the next day of work when 3 other people came up to me sayin the principal was talkin bout me to them...come on now is this preschool...aren't we all grown...don't I do my job despite all the setbacks...that bitch can kick rocks in flip flops for all the hell I care.

Then to make matters worse...I find out that this teacher I share a room wit threw out all the textbooks the kids use...I only have about 25 books for all my middle school students...and the crazy thing is...this muthafucka admitted to throwin them out cuz the kids left them under the desks instead of puttin them back...WUT THE HELL?!?!?! So I report this shit to the vice principal and she says that this isn't the first time that teacher has done that...WUT THE HELL?!?!? Since when can u jus throw books out and not have any consequences???

Then they give us the scan sheets to do report cards last Friday and they wanted them completed on Monday…now that wouldn’t have been that much of a problem if I didn’t have over 100 student grades to calculate and bubble in. Come on now..have a damn heart…evil bastards lol.

Lately I've been feelin a lil aggrevated and frustrated wit the way my luv life (or should I say lack thereof) has been going...the following is something I wrote a few weeks back but never posted and only shared wit a few people:

How do u react when everyone around u is happy but u???? It seems like everyone else is on cloud 9...yet ur on the ground floor... U watch those around u experiencing the joy of havin someone wit them...a boyfriend or a boo...or jus a boy for the min???

I've been wonderin this for a while now...im not hatin on my people for havin someone n their lives they can share special moments with....someone who they can call and lean on when their havin a rough day or jus wanna vent...Im happy for them...it jus makes me wonder when will it be my time???

I've been single for some time now and im sooo tired of it....im startin to think somethin may be wrong wit me...I dunno.... On second thought...nah…no way lol...it jus seems like whenever im feelin someone they're not feelin me for wutever reason....and the thing is...I wanna know the reason so I can adjust wutever the "turn off" factor is...its like im constantly subjectiin myself to bein hurt....but maybe its partly my fault....grrrrrrr...but hopefully ill get over it....in time right??? uggghhh

Im not the most together guy there is...but im doin pretty good...im learnin more about myself and growin from it...I have a career, my own place, car, and strivin for more...im a loyal and dedicated and honest person...but I guess those things r turn offs for others...it makes me think...hmmmm

Im jus aggrevated right now...im tryin to stay positive but the shit gets harder every day...when will it be my time??? When will I stop fallin for the guys that don't wanna deal wit me on that level? When will I find the guy that's as crazy for me as I am for him? So many questions...but yet no answers...hmmmm....im jus frustrated, aggrevated, and tired of the bull....I need a drink and a cigarette...maybe thatll bring some clarity...if not at least ill feel better

Returnin back to the present.....Well now that I've got that out...I feel a lil better...well other than bein horny as hell...haven't had sex in a while and its startin to take its toll lol... guess im glowin like a nite light lol

I've been called the most conservative out the group lol so I don't do random hookups or anythin like that....if I kiss someone or do anything further wit a dude I've known him for awhile....but thas not even happenin right now...ugghh...wuts a guy to do...im jus waitin for the right guy...even though I got someone on my mind lol....it gets a lil depressin at times but ill manage....I have hope that things will work out fine…maybe this is a time when I should focus on other things like work and other rah rah (but I think ive done that enough lol)

Well this week is almost over and im plottin for the weekend kinda...im thinkin bout havin the crew over for some movies, drinks, and some eats...but I guess time will tell lol. Of course imma have to finish school work before I can relax. Wut yall got planned for the weekend??? Anything interesting?

The Power of a Kiss

2008-11-18T10:07:00.004-05:00

Sealed wit a kiss...

Have u ever thought about ur last kiss? Wut were u feeling as u did it? Wut feelings were being passed to u? Wut feelings were u passing?

The power of a kiss is something that people sometimes fail to realize. The emotion, passion, love, and n some cases lust (or horniness lol) is something that can ake ur breath away.

A kiss can be the beginning..it can seal a deal..it can be the end...it can be one of the greatest moments yet one of the saddest at the same time....a kiss can say hello...it can say good bye...it can say uve been missed...it can say don't go...it can say wut u can't find the words for...its amazing how one action can say so much.

Personally I love kissing although I don't do it much lol ::thinkin:: thas not really funny...kinda sad when u think bout it lol...but anyway....I like being kissed...starts off slow...gentle...warm...but given the time and the moment it takes on a life of its own. I've had kisses leave me breathless right before I took his breath away...I've been kissed and had chills sent thru my body as I grabbed the back of his head and go n for the kill...I've had kisses start off as kisses but ended up wit us havin hickies and sore necks lol...I've been kissed and have kissed that have.....ok lemme stop and catch my breath and relax ::clears throat and sips some water::

So like I was sayin....a lot can be said and felt n a kiss...wut bout yall? Ever had that kiss that left u wantin more? That kiss u never wanted to end? Wut were u feelin and were tryin to get that other person to feel?

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

2008-11-07T13:53:00.000-05:00

This was sent to me and made me laugh...wanted to share wit yall..hopefully u will get a smile outta it.

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1.At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See If They Slow Down.

2.Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3.Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4.Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it 'In'.

5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6.In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write 'For Smuggling Diamonds'.

7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.

8.Don't use any punctuation.

9.As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10.Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

12.Sing Along At The Opera.

13.Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14.Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15.Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16.Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17.When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

18.When Leaving The Zoo, start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

19.Tell Your Children Over Dinner , 'Due To The Economy , We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

20.And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .. Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile. Its Called ... therapy...

Happy Friday people...anyone have anything planned???

When I See U....

2008-11-05T11:30:00.003-05:00

Wrote this awhile ago..in september...thought id share

When I see u I see more than wuts on the outside.
I see the passion that u hold within.
I see the dedication and determination of someone who has limitless potential....
I see someone, who like me, had to grow up fast and learn how to be independent early.

I see the gentle, loving, and caring person that's within.
I see someone who cares for others and sacrifices for them...
I see someone who holds things in but knows how to let things out...
I see someone who can make me smile without saying a word.

I see more than wuts on the surface....
where others see shallowness in u I see depth...
I see the deep thoughts that pass thru ur mind.
I see nothin but the best for u...
I see more n u and for u than I can say.

Do u see it too??? I wonder...

Party Pics...

2008-11-03T09:37:00.002-05:00

As promised...here are some of the pics from the party last week...

This past weekend.....

2008-10-27T09:08:00.010-04:00

Hey people...well the weekend has once again come and gone and its back to work I go....ugghh

Here's one of the pics that shawn took of me a while ago...wut yall think???

Well I had a really good time at my bday party on sat...I cooked for the event...now I know..who cooks for their own party...I DO!!!! It was my way of saying thanx to those who have been there for thru my ups and downs and helpin me deal wit me lol...my friends...I luv yall...shouts to X, Shawn, Fuzzy, Keelee, Tookie, Shawne, Special, My Twin, Washington...if I left anyone out charge it to my head and not my heart.

Well I made some pasta wit ground turkey and turkey sausage...chicken n a brandy bbq sauce, stir fried veggies, potato salad..and some good ol drinks (more on that n a bit lol) Well I guess it was good cuz all that was left was a corner of potato salad and a lil pasta lol. I got complements on the food so I was happy.

I also whipped up some good ol Get Rite Juice, a batch of Promiscuous (that I didn't even get any of), and the newly released Scorpion...now that scorpion was smooth but had a sting on then end of it...jus how I wanted it to be. Yall shoulda see me mixin that drink on fri night..got myself tipsy as hell getting the mix jus right. Well I guess the drinks were good cuz clearly they were all gone. Ended up havin to concoct another gallon of some new punch that was named Scorpion Remixed...or Scorpion pt 2...or somethin like that lol...There was also beer and other alcohol floatin around...we had a good ol time lol.

My boy got me a cake and I was fightin to keep the smile off my face. In the past hardly anybody did anything for me on my bday..maybe a drink or a cupcake or somethin...so havin a cake touched me...even though my boy decided to touch me wit the cake when I wasn't lookin...had frostin all n my face and n my nose lol...Thanx Jughead.

Did I mention I was feelin myself last night...I thought I looked quite sexy...which is new for me lol. Had on a new outfit, was smellin all good and stuffis, and I was feelin quite right. However, my frisky-o-meter has been reaching critical and them drinks weren't helping any...but nonetheless I was feelin good about myself especially wit folks sayin I looked smaller and tryin to force me to eat more...clearly a good self esteem boost lol.

It was good to have everyone out helpin me celebrate my bday a lil early. Some faces were new, some were old, some I had known for a short time, and some I don't even know/remember lol. Im tellin u get rite will get u rite lol. As soon as I get the pics from my camera (which is being held hostage lol) ill post some. Went out to eat last night..well I was kidnapped and hoodwinked into goin somehwere...clearly wit a hangover...but i still had a good time...thanx guys.

Im at work now...feelin some type of way right bout now...but thats a topic for another post lol....The bday is on tuesday and im thinkin bout havin a few people over sometime this week for some drinks and to chill...but who knows wut the week will bring. Yall know imma have another paper to do...oh yeah jus finished another class yesterday and the new one starts today...damn can I get a break...don't u see me tryin to enjoy my bday week and not have a liver...don't interrupt...rude

I've said n a past post im tryin to be upfront and honest and sayin wut I mean..and meanin wut I say...soooo before I end this post jus wanted to once again say thanx to my friends...cherish those who have been there for u....ur all special to me and I hope yall know it. I've told some of u b4 how I felt about u and how I value our connections/bonds...jus wanted to say it again...or for the first time if I haven't told u...so now I end this post...getting another year older and another year better

Let the countdown begin....

2008-10-24T09:53:00.006-04:00

Well it’s finally the end of another week…right now im at work counting down the hours till I can race the kids out the building. Once again this has been a week full of surprises in the good ol education field. For starters there was a surprise assembly on Tuesday for the high school students. Key word….surprise. Nobody knew wut the hell was goin on…well none of the kids and teachers anyway..and when questioned about it..the lady in charge of the assembly gave u the look of death…clearly these people don’t realize that im officially crazy and will flip the hell out. But I did jus have to show this other lady in the assembly exactly how crazy I am….i’ve warned her before about talking to me anyway she sees fit. I’ve warned her once….warned her twice….there is no third time…I know she’s gonna think twice bout talking to me now…she jus betta choose her words carefully lol.

Then we had a half day on Wed..well the kids did anyway cuz staff had inservices…how bout nobody knew where the hell we were supposed to go. Then I get told I’m supposed to go to the caf wit everyone else….ummmm yeah the meeting was about vocabulary and reading strategies ::looks around and raises hand:: I think they forgot I’m a Spanish Teacher…wut the hell am I gonna do wit reading strategies….my kids aren’t reading any novels in Spanish. I jus laughed, sat down, and pretended to be interested…thanx to the Bacardi limon and sprite I had before the meeting started…lol…shut up don’t judge me.

The weekend is here and my bday party is Sat night…my actual birthday is Tuesday but we’re celebrating tomorrow. Goin out for drinks on Tuesday night,,..I think…oh well lol. After work I gotta get a hair cut, run to the grocery store, dollar store, liquor store and start my cookin and punch making. Im unveiling a new drink at the party…The Scorpion…its gonna be red…and strong but sweet at the same time…I’ve almost got the recipe perfected but it will be ready by tomorrow….so I can add that to the other punches and creations I’ve come up with. Imma do a lil bit of cookin tonight and gonna finish up the rest tomorrow. I’m not sure who’s actually comin or not but I could care less cuz I know me and the crew are gonna have a good time regardless. Hell…that means more food and liquor for us lol. But if ur in the area feel free to stop by lol.

I'm thinkin.....

2008-10-21T10:30:00.004-04:00

I've been thinkin about my book post for a while now..different thoughs passin thru my head at different times... I asked yall wut yall thought about this...here's wut I think... Why is it so hard for us as a people to embrace our children and one another for who we are. Jus cuz ur attracted to the same sex doesn't make u less of a person or any of that. I remember tellin my mom after comin out to her (more on that later n the post) would u be happier if I told u I got some girl pregnant? Or I was addicted to drugs? Like being gay is the worst thing n the world.

Unfortunately many of our parents and elders feels that way for some reason. Now I can only speak for me but being gay wasn't a choice....its how I was born...is part of who I am. Does my being gay take away from every other part of me???? Hell no...so y is it so hard for people to accept the fact that we are all different...to each his own...and all that other rah rah.

If my mother or family referred to me as the "gay son" or "gay one" or wutever I know it would bother me. I don't know how long it would have taken me to get over that kind of hurt/betrayal and thank God I don't have to worry bout that.

I can relate to the author's words (however poorly written at times) about black folks being thrown outta their families and cast aside. That was one of my greatest fears growing up. Being kicked to the curb for bein who u truly are. That's part of the reason it took me so long to come out to my mom. Althought she raised me the majority of my life as a ingle parent, I still had no idea wut to expect.

Y do we feel we have to hide our tru selves? When will our soceity be able to accept us as equals? It's kinda sad that other cultures and ethnicities can embrace, accept, and support their children whole heartedly. Although some successes have been made i feel like we have a long way to go.

Gettin better....kinda

2008-10-17T10:46:00.005-04:00

Wassup blogworld....well its finally the end of another week...thank ya Jesus...I've been a lil outta commission cuz I caught a cold and it had me feelin like pure untampered crap. Oh the joys of teachin a bunch of sniffin and sneezin ankle bitters. I couldn't even go to the gym for 2 days...but I dragged my but in on wed. & yesterday. Wasn't back to 100% but I didn't wanna miss the gym...damn dedication. Walked into the building today and checked the mailbox and guess wut...a memo sayin they having a surprise assembly for the kids. How in the hell r u gonna jus have surprise assemblies and not tell the teachers so we can plan our lessons. Now wouldn't that make sense???

Its scorpio season and I can feel it n the air. I've been feelin "frisky" lately...ok more so than usual lol...but its cuz this is my zodiac season. The tru scorpio is much harder to keep back during these 2 months lol. Sensual, freaky, sexy, intuitive, raw, passionate....Imma try and keep him at bay but im not makin any promises lol. U know wut they say bout us scorpios lol.

Recently I've been seeing some changes n my body and im happy bout them. My students, coworkers, and friends have mentioned that I've changed. I really hadn't noticed that much until I started lookin (or was forced to look) at older pictures. Now don't get me wrong...I was still hittin the gym and watchin wut I eat (during the week anyway lol) but I really wasn't payin that much attention to it. I guess the first sign was my clothes fittin looser...then I had to buy new underware cuz mine were falling off...then I had to buy new a belt and smaller clothes...I started feelin good...healthier...and better about myself.

But the extreme kick n the ass for me was yesterday. I went to the gym still coughing and sneezing but had a great workout. I decided to get on the scale which is somethin I don't do often. I started playin wit the damn thing....slidin this part hre and the other part there...really who had to make these things so damn difficult..who knew u needed a degree to weigh urself...well after I think I figure it out I don't believe the number...I go and stalk a personal trainer so I can use their digital scale..well after that damn scale finished blinkin and flashin and all the other rah rah it showed the number...I was shocked I had lost weight from he last time I weighed myself. So with a smile on my face I thought bout how much weight I've lost total....yeah I did tell yall im a Spanish teacher not a math teacher so I had to break out the phone and use the calculator....so far I've lost 50 pounds people...Thank ya Jeses......50 fuckin pounds...I don't think yall know how souped and motivated I am now.

I feel like I've accomplished a goal I set....well actually I passed that goal and now I've set a new one. I wanna lose another 20lbs but even if I don't im still happy...but trust me imma get these other 20 off. Maybe ill post some pictures after I take some new ones...give yall some before and after shots so u can see.

The weekend is here and of course I gotta write another paper but im gonna bang it out...gotta keep that GPA high. Really don't have anythin planned other than payin bills and getting some birthday clothes. I still have bout 2 weeks till the day but id rather get it outta the way. Its funny how getting another year older can change the way u think about things, situations, and people...but thas a topic for another post lol. Wut yall have planned for this supposedly chilly weekend??? Bout time fall finally showed the hell up...80 degrees in october..clearly its the end of days.

Wut yall think?

2008-10-10T13:31:00.002-04:00

Hey yall, I’ve been meaning to post this for a while but never got around to it. Had a break in the day so I took the chance to post this since I can post from the school’s laptop lol. Yall know I like to read but I recently finished a book “Hiding In Hip Hop” by Terrance Dean. It was an ok read…nuttin to scream about and recommend. I thought it was gonna be better than what it actually was. Anyway there was a section in the book that I wanted to share:

Things were different for me. He was white and I was black. His community was more accepting of his sexuality. It’s hard as hell to be an educated, smart, and attractive gay black man in the black community.

We don’t discuss sex and sexuality in our community. It’s taboo. Try to bring up the topic of sexuality and you will get shot down. No one wants to talk about it. If someone is gay in our family we whisper about them. Even though everyone knows, our families don’t want to know the details. We don’t openly discuss it nor do we tell everyone.

I’ve often heard people in white families say that they have a gay child and strongly support him or her. Or that they have a brother or sister who’s gay. “We love them no matter what,” they say.

You’ll rarely hear people in a black family say anything about their gay child or sibling. Many of us are disowned by our families. Sure, it happens in the white community, but in the black community it’s a sin before God for a man to be attracted to other men. The black churches and ministers preach emphatically on the despicable lifestyle of a gay man. As a young man growing up in the church there wasn’t a Sunday where the minister didn’t say something negative or derogatory about gay men and women.

Many nights I cried, praying to God, asking and pleading with him to take away my sinful homosexual thoughts. Man, I wanted to be straight. I wanted to live my life as a heterosexual man with a wife and kids, but I couldn’t shake my urges for men. I knew this would be my burden for life.

I had met many gay men who had been shunned by their families. They were put on the streets at an early age, their mothers and fathers refusing to speak to them. They had become outcasts. Some had suffered severe abuse from their parents who tried to beat the homosexuality out of them. Others, forced into therapy, were told it was a phase they were going through. They needed to have their heads examined, and maybe the psychiatrist could find the reason and cure. I just learned to keep my mouth shut and for good reason.

What do yall think about this? Any opinions?

Warning....This Is A Public Service Announcement

2008-10-07T23:03:00.000-04:00

In the past few weeks I've noticed that a lot of people ad companies are guilty of a serious offense....FALSE ADVERTISING!!!! Now it may seem like nothing at all but imma give yall some examples....

U see this dude while ur was out one night...he looks bout 6'5...maybe 250lbs solid muscle...nice teeth etc...but when he goes to speaks..sounds like a 3 year old girl....FALSE ADVERTISING

I have a student in the 7th grade...she dresses like a female and thanx to early puberty she has the body of a grown woman...y is her voice deeper than mine??? FALSE ADVERTISING

Growing up I was always told that a college degree could set me for the future...ummm does anyonne else realize that a bachelor's degree is like a high school diploma now...FALSE ADVERTISING

Some people say one thing but their actions are completely contradictory...they have people thinkin one thing when they're thinkin or gonna do another...clearly a case of FALSE ADVERTISING

Fat free foods are supposed to be better for u right??? Well y n the hell are their higher in sodium and preservatives and other rah rah rah...so I won't gain weight but ill die of a stroke or a heart attack...sounds great right??? FALSE ADVERTISING

America is supposed to be the greatest country in the world right? Then y r we n a damn recession wit stocks falling and gas prices are higher than I would b after some good weed? FALSE ADVERTISING

Y I saw this dude the other day and thought he was cute as hell...but then after further inspection I realized he was actually a she...FALSE ADVERTISING

If love is supposed to be one of the greatest feelings and emotions ever...y can it be the source of great pain and hurt as well...FALSE ADVERTISING

Clothing companies should not make certain things in every size...jus cuz it n ur size doesn't mean u should wear it...I mean really 4xlarge spandex is a mess....FALSE ADVERTISING

Lube that claims to have a gentle warming sensation but actually ends up burning...FALSE ADVERTISING

Fitness water that has more calories than soda...FALSE ADVERTISING

Walmart rolls back the prices so u save...y do u end up spendin a arm, leg, and a testicle??? FALSE ADVERTISING

Keepin in mind the comment above...y is it that when stuff is on sale u end up spendin more...damn mall sales...FALSE ADVERTISING

Clearly.....this is wut we live in lol...Wut do yall think bout this??? Now I know yall have some more to add to this list...

Aint life grand???

2008-10-03T15:55:00.000-04:00

Well...another week down...hey people...feels like I haven't posted n a while but anyway...jus been tryin to handle things that are thrown at me on a daily basis...and im still tryin to make sense outta some stuff. Maybe ill let yall know in more detail later....then again maybe not lol.

Work is work...same ol shit wit a dif twist. Constantly dealing wit pettiness from adults, attitudes from kids, and jus the usual daily drawn out school day. Hell, im still goin to the wrong classes on some days. The other day some lil ass kid was like "nice fitted teach...run that shit." I had to remember I was a teacher (as I picked his ass up by his bookbag straps) cuz I was gonna teach his ass a new kinda lesson...not to fuck wit a stressed out man who can benchpress u wit one hand.

Then after livin the life of a teacher I still gotta live the life of a student...grad school will be over n may and I can't wait. Im so sick of researching and writing papers, answerin discussion questions, and havin to plot my weekends around whatever assignment I have to do. Sometimes I regret goin back to school but I knew it was a move I had to make. Unlike other jobs, the only way u can get a raise in education is to get another degree...so u gotta take out loans to go back to school to get a raise jus to have to pay back the government...ummm does anyone see the sense n that???

Then after that im still goin to the gym and tryin to keep healthy and in shape. Although im not where I wanna be yet, im better than I was. Body fat percentage is way down from wut it used to be, put on muscle (didnt really want to though lol), and lost 35 pounds. Sometimes its a pain n the ass forcing myself to go to the gym, other times I don't wanna go cuz of other things I have to do or i jus don't have the energy to go. But I try to go 4 times a week. Why couldn't I have my fathers metabolism...he can eat wutever he wants and not gain a ounce...if I smell a cheeseburger I can feel a pound jump on me outta thin air...or should I say fat air lol.

Sometimes it feels things r going great...like im on top...on cloud 9, 7, or 3 wutever number that good cloud is lol.....but then its like a brick wall pops up and I get knocked upside the head and slammed back to earth. Jus like life huh??? U got ur ups and ur downs..aint it a blast :-/ Had a semi good day at work today but when I get to my car at the end of the day I see....a damn parking ticket...wut the hell?!?!? They're doin constrution on the main street so where the hell r we supposed to park...now I wasn't parked all that illegal...I was jus under 50 ft from a stop sign...but really if there were parking available clearly I woulda been able to park somewhere else...ugghhh

Then earlier this week we get a memo sayin that if we miss more than 6.4 das from work our attendance will be unsatisfactory for the year...so that raises 2 questions...umm how the hell do u have .4 days? And how can u give me sick days but tell me I can't use them? Lets say that I wanna take 1 day off a month jus for a mental break...so I don't choke slam somebody's child...that woul be a total of 10 days for the school year...so according to that memo I would have unsatisfactory attendance...maybe I should jus spaz out one day hmmm..I have like 50 somethin sick days so trust me imma be usin some of them lol

Well the weekend is finally here and I really don't have any plans...like usual....other than getting a hair cut and laundry I jus go wit the flow (after I finish this paper grrr) Who wants to help me write it lol...wut yall got planned for this chilly weekend? Anyone got any ideas?

Thank u for choosing Sprint....yeah right

2008-09-16T16:37:00.000-04:00

I know most of us have some trouble wit our phones or the wonderful customer service reps but this was my experience wit good ol Sprint yesterday...

I go into the sprint store yeserday to have them tighten my screen. I have a mogul and the screen gets lose after a while of sliding it back and forth. I went to sprint a lil while ago and they fixed it n bout 5 mins...so I was thinkin this would be a quick trip.....boy was I wrong.

I get to the store and im the second person n line to see the tech people. I see that there were about 4 tech reps helpin customers so im thinkin I shouldn't be in line long...ummm...noooo...I was in line for bout a half hour. Why the hell was I n line for a half hour when I was the second person n line and there were 4 customer service tech people???

So I finally get to the counter and I explan to the lady that I jus wanted my screen fixed and she starts to tell me that they can't fix it....ummm she clearly didnt know that I was jus there last month and they did it. So she takes my phone and gives it to the tech guy and he looks at it and hands it back. She then opens the back of my phone and takes out the battery...ummm y r u doin all this wen I jus need the screen fixed. And I didn't want them to notice that there was some water damage from hurricane Jawakabatima tryin to drown my phone a few weeks ago.

After she scans the battery she did some other stuff to it and tried to turn my phone back on. Yeah....no...wuteva the hell she did damaged my phone and it wouldn't turn on. So now im lookin like "bitch u done broke my phone ...now I gotta kill u." So after the tech guy tells her that she broke it (and I clearly heard him say it) I ask her a question...well not really a question..it was more of a suggestion..I say "U do have a new phone for me n the back and it will be set up n the next 5 mins since u broke my phone...right???" She looked at me like I had lost my mind...but when she saw the look n my face she said "ill get right on that for u" so I said "thanx cuz I really didn't wanna drive thru the store."

So I was kinda souped and a lil pissed cuz now its like im startin all ova again. Lost contacts, some pics, text messages, and other rah rah rah but thanx to good ol ActiveSync I can put most of that stuff back. The phone that was fresh out the box didnt have the latest software on it so I had to update the phone myself. How do u have to update a brand new phone??? Gotta luv it right??? So I get home after damn near killin myself at the gym and start to update the phone. The website says it can take up to 10 mins but from experience I know it takes bout 30min-1 hour...damn false advertising...so after fightin wit the computer and the phone I was finally able to sync the two and have all my contacts and the like restored after bout 3 hours. Aint technology great!!!! Hell im still tryin to put my ringtones in the correct folders. Another dose of bull right? lol

Dreaming....

2008-09-14T14:12:00.000-04:00

I get lost n ur eyes
Ur touch makes me melt
When u hold me I feel safe and at peace
When I hold u I feel like im protecting a rare treasure...one of the most important things n my life

Ur kiss makes me shiver and my knees weak
Theres nothin we wouldn't do for one another
The bond we have is strong
The connection is crazy
U can read my thoughts
I never thought I would meet someone who gets me like u do
U pass thru my mind a billion times a day

Sometimes I jus wanna hold u and chill
Sometimes I jus wanna talk
Watchin u sip on a drink while I cook
But wit u im down for wutever
Maybe its cuz theres more to us than meets the eye

I reach out for u...to wrap u n my arms
Jus to hold u as u hold me
To silently show im thankful u've come into my life
Jus to show my appreciation for being there for me
For listening, advising, and keeping me focused
But as I reach for u...I realize ur not there

Im awake now...madd it was jus a dream
Another night dreamin of wut it will be like
When the time is right my dream will become a reality and u will be there
Never to leave
Ill b there for u
I've learned that dreams can come tru
But until the time comes I will see u when I close my eyes....sweet dreams...sleep well

Got a pen???

2008-09-12T22:21:00.000-04:00

Im the type of person that enjoys may things. Drinking, cookin, and hangin wit the crew are at the top of the list lol but two of my fav past times are reading and writing. I have often found comfort in a good book. Maybe its cuz I grew up as a only child and tv would bore me after awhile. I began writing early n life. I would write songs and poems that would come to be published and read at different events.

As I got older I gave up on writing until around my sophomore year in high school. I had a teacher who made us practice my different forms of writing and my love for writing came back once again. I've used writing as a form of therapy and self expession. Sometimes I can better express myself on paper than in person which some people find weird lol.

In past relationships I've used writing to effectively communicate my feelings, emotions, and thoughts. It helps cuz u get to clear ur head of everything and then if u want to u can read it to the other person so they can know wut goin on wit u. Well that has been my experience wit it lol.

Words r interesting...wit words u can tell a story, paint a picture, dedscribe things n such vivid detail that it feels like ur actually there. When I write I feel like its my expression n its purest form...like a mental cleansing.

Those that know me know that I usually have a ton of shit floatin thru my head. Thas y its sometimes hard for me to post cuz im conflicted as to wut to write about. Problems, headache, heartache, anger, and joy, are among the many other emotions, feelings, and thoughts that flow thru me. Sometimes its jus too much so I try to talk/write it out. Feels like if I don't release the pressure my head and heart will explode and ill be left an empty shell devoid of feeling anything.

So ill continue to write. As new chapters unfold in my life im sure ill have more to write. Im thinkin/hopin a particular chapter will start soon for me...and trust me if it goes well im sure ill be writing more and writing out of happiness. Lemme get my pen ready....

It's for the kids....right???

2008-09-10T22:20:00.000-04:00

After an awsome weekend of chillin and cookin and dealin wit hurricane jawakabatima tryin to drown my phone, I had to go back to work on monday. Tuesday/wednesday makes it officially one week back at work and talk about bittersweet....sweet cuz the paychecks will be comin once again (thank ya Jesus) and bitter cuz once again im bein forced to work another crazy ass, makes no sense, who n the hell came up wit this bull type of schedule.

Im a Spanish teacher at a middle/high school and have voiced my concerns about being placed or should I say forced to work n the middle school component of the school when I know I would be better n the high school. For the past three years I've had to hold my tongue, or at least try, cuz i didn't have tenure and could be let go and not rehired. Well now I finally have tenure and I've been cuttin the hell loose. When I don't like how somethin is goin...trust and believe im lettin it be known...some call it rude, others call it real...I really dont give a damn lol.

Im one of the few teachers n my school who actually has genuine concern for my kids. My students know that im there for them for school, home, family and other problems. Some of them have my number and don't hesitate to call when somethin is goin on or jus to say hi. Parents have come to me sayin how their child talks about how much they like my class and me and have thanked me for helpin their child n any way.

Its such a great feeling.....however when ur bosses are a bunch of old bass ackward idiots who don't care bout nuttin but collectin a paycheck, it takes away from the joy. Prime example of stupidity can be found in scheduling....can some please explain to me why im teachin 7 classes...3 high school ad 4 middle school...I see the high school classes everyday but I only see each middle school class one day a week. How the hell do u expect middle school kids, or anybody for that matter, to learn anything about a foreign language when they only have it one day a week for 40 mins????? Ummm did I mention that I don't have my own classroom and my schedule changes everyday??? If anyone can find sense n that please lemme know cuz clearly I don't get it.

Currently im majorin in education administration so im takin a bunch of classes about how schools should be run. Every week im wrtiing a paper about how ideal schools should be or the legal aspects of education or communication in the workplace or some other type of rah rah rah. Can I tell u how depressing it is to know wut my school could be like if my no neck havin dinosaur for a principal wasn't there???

The other day I was meetin wit one of my 7th grade classes for the first time and they were doin their work. Now they were a lil loud but thas cuz they were havin fun doin their assignment. Why did the principal come n the room and told them they were too loud and blasted them bout how they should listen and blah blah blah....I was lookin at the rain while she was talkin....well after her dumb ass speech she leaves...but...as she leave she looks at me and...wait for it....the bitch rolled her eyes....come on now ur the damn principal and ur rollin ur eyes....lets be serious...if she woulda jus asked me wut they were doin I coulda easily told here and had them settle down......quite frankly I think its great when u have kids excited bout school work but maybe thas jus me.

Its only been the first week and im countin down the days till june...someone pray for me so I don choke a child, trip the principal, or drive my car thru the building.

Guess wut dad???

2008-09-01T23:59:00.000-04:00

Happy labor day everyone....I hope everyone enjoyed their last day of summer cuz its officially time for us teachers to get back to work...oh joy lol

Well my father called me yesterday while I was at the beach wit the crew and left me a voicemail sayin my nana was havin a cookout. I haven't seen my nana in a while cuz I don't go to south jersey that often so I thought it would be nice if I surprised her.

So today I get n el carro aka re-re and head on down to good ol trenton to see my nana and my dads side of the fam. Now lemme give yall some background on my father. Our relationship hasn't been all that great cuz he's a druug addicted alcoholic who decided drugs were more important than raisin me and stayin wit my mother.....but im gonna leave the story there for now. Well...recently he's been reachin out to me and tryin to keep in touch but I've been keepin him at a distance.

Anyway today I had a really good time wit my dads side of the family. Had some cheap beer and some good ol nana food and saw some cousins I haven't seen since forever ago. Now here's where it gets a lil crazy...my dad gets drunk and starts fightin wit my aunt..but it was hilarous for me cuz they fight like brother and sister (maybe cuz they are right??? Lol).
Today I actually saw how much my dad and I are alike. It was a lil creepy at some points cuz I never wanted to be like him...at all...not in the least bit lol...but today I saw I am truly my fathers child...especially n our jokes and the way we drink lol.

After some more drinks my dad and I start to talk and get a lil emotional so I start tellin him how not havin him around has caused some emotional/mental issues in me that surfaced a few years ago...but have since been dealt with for the most part...everyday is a lil better.

Ok so like I said we were drinking and I came out to my dad....lemme say it again.....I CAME OUT TO MY FATHER!!!! it was like...hey dad....guess wut??? lol...the shit was priceless but it wasn't that bad..he took it quite well and said he loves me no matter wut and that he kinda had an idea...but wutever lol. So now both my parents know and I feel closer to my dad...hopefully our relationship will be better and I can finally get over the hurt, anger, and other negative feelings.

Internal Affairs....

2008-08-21T21:36:00.001-04:00

Heads and tails
Left and right
Up and down
Yin and yang
Right and wrong
Tops and bottoms lol

Its all about balance...theres always something to counter its opposite. But wut happens when the balance begins to shift from one side to another??? Unrest...turmoil...headache...WAR

There are times when I struggle wit myself as most people do...its like there are two sides battlin it out...like the Spartans fightin Xerxes and the Persians lol

Salad or fries...fried or baked...gym or sleep...to smut out or keep hope alive...to care or not give a damn...to be patient or jus say fuck it...aren't choices great???

Sometimes I jus wanna say fuck it and do all the things that I don't do. Jus wanna let the Scorpio out and not care for a min...but I know it wouldn't be me.

I do a pretty decent job of keepin it together but sometimes it feels like one side is getting the best of the other and thus the unrest and turmoil begin...oh well its jus part of being human right??? But that doesn't make it fun.

Tops and bottoms
Right and wrong
Yin and yang
Up and down
Left and right
Heads and tails

On the shore...

2008-08-13T12:30:00.001-04:00

Standing on the shores of change at the sea of fate
The waves of wonder crash and wash over me
Feeling destiny's mist spaying my face
But yet Im afraid to fully step in

So ill continue to stand here and look
Gazing into the sunset and feeling the breeze
Something catches my eye
Curiosity peaked, senses aroused, interest steadily growing

I've got to see wut it is...wut is this thing that's got my attention? Wut is this im feeling? Wait a sec....where did it go?

No longer content on the shores of change
Pondering as the waves of wonder continue to crash
As destiny's mist moistens my face
I still think about the thing that caught my eye
I can almost see it in the sea of fate

Still afraid yet somehow less I take the first step in
Will fate destroy me or will I survive???
Only time will tell
Change and destiny have conspired with wonder and fate so here I am.

Left to wonder
Wading thru fate...maintaining focus
Curious...
Determined....
Mesmerized...
Into the sea...

Jus Some Random Thoughts

2008-08-08T01:15:00.003-04:00

So here I am at 12:40 am and have a bunch of random crap flowin thru my mind...warning these thoughts were written as they passed thru my head so there's no pattern or system or any of that other rah rah rah...

Why do I have to take out the trash so damn much??? I live alone (for the most part)

Why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway?

Wut should I put in my new drink that im creating?

Wut other types of recipes can I come up with?

Why the hell can't I blog from my computer?

Why do people go to the gym smellin like hot bunrt wolf knuckels that were rolled in moldy cheese and left n the sun on a hot august day? (and im soooo not exaggerating)

Why if u move things by car it's called shipment but if u move things by ship it's called cargo?

Why do I smile to myself when I think about....? Oh u thought I was gonna put the name?? Oh well lol

Wut will the weekend will bring?

Who n the hell told me to go back to school? Its all a scam anyway...right???

Why is it that u can be with people and still feel lonely?

Why don't people realize how good they have it?

Why am I always bustin my ass reading or writing somethin...but dammit I gets it done

Why do I cook and not eat?

Why is it sooo hard to get a summer job? (Oh the joy of being a teacher)

Why don't I know wut I wanna be when I grow up?

Wut's n store for me in the future in different areas (relationship, career, car, house)?

How many ways can u cook chicken?

Didn't I jus get my hair cut?

Why is shit sooooo damn expensive?

Why is Wal-Mart the devil?

Why does it cost more to eat/live healthier?

Why are u so sore sometimes after workin out that u never wanna do it again?

Why is it 1:15 am and Im still thinkin crazy random thoughts?

Wuts on ur mind???

Rock a bye

2008-08-02T16:01:00.000-04:00

::wiping drool from mouth and crust outta my eyes...looks around yawns and checks breath for freshness:: I don't know about u but my bed is stuffed wit crack, Tylenol PM, and Thera-Flu. It's the type of bed that u have to fight to get out of. I'm talkin about settin the alarm about a half hour before u wanna get up cuz ur gonna have to struggle and fight ur way out. Now....I have a newer bed frame but my mattress is old as hell. It was my Pop-pop's (grandfather for yall who don't know lol) but I got it when he passed. I was thinkin bout getting a new one but the shit is sooooooo comfy. I'm talkin about the type of bed that jus takes all ur aches, pains, and hangovers away. I don't consider myself to be a late sleeper (shut up Shawn & Fuzzy lol) its not my fault...its the curse of the bed. Im tellin u it makes no sense. Screw sleep number, air beds, and those beds that u can jump on without spillin the wine (who actually does that??? my momma woulda beat the jump outta me if she caught me jumpin on a bed...especially wit a glass of anything..im talkin bout not even a glass of air) my bed is the ultimate nights rest and if ur not careful the ultimate half of the next day's rest too.

And don't get me started on my couches....I haven't met anyone that could resist the call of the overstuffed sectionals. Everyone who has visited me has passed out one time or another. Think your gonna jus sit and watch some tv ummm......no. Couches that can double as guest beds and provide a decent nights sleep...jus don't compare them wit the bed lol.

I've been told that its a combo of the furniture and the comfortable atmosphere that's in my apt. Trust me...it's not set up like no hotel or nuttin...hell i haven't even done any decorating other than a couple pictures and some candles...but hey its wuteva....I'm jus glad that my friends are comfortable enough to come over, raid my fridge, and pass out after losing in Wii or PS2 games.

Wut u say???

2008-07-30T00:43:00.000-04:00

Ok so I've been thinkin about this for a min and had to take the time to get my thoughts in order...ok well in more of an order than they were....this is just part of my thoughts...my question is..why don't people be real wit it??? Say wut u mean and mean wut u say...claim wut the hell u want and go for it.

Im gonna tackle this question a couple of ways...for starters..is it so hard to say wut u want? This can apply to a number of situations but lets start from the point of talkin to someone...y is it that people hide their true intentions..if u wanna get ur back blown out say so...if u wanna blow a back out jus say it...sure u might be seen as rude or wutever but there won't be any confusion as to ur intentions and u suure as hell won't be lyin to anyone....say wut the hell u mean!!!!

Don't waste ur or anyone elses time. Don't approach wit false motives. Be real wit it and truthful...I've noticed that that's somethin that many people have trouble with. How can u be honest wit someone else when u can't be honest wit urself..but that's a topic for another post...

Ok so back to this...let ur intentions be known..Don't approach me on the whole get to know me tip if all u wanna know is how deep my stroke is, how my tongue ring feels, or how the KAKES taste....Don't hide ur true intentions...lemme know wassup...trust me it'll save a lot of time and headaches...now im not sayin ur gonna get any of the aforementioned things from me...but jus be upfront wit it.

On another note...Im soo sick of people sayin wut they want in a relationship but yet do the complete opposite. If u say u wanna be in a committed relationship y the hell r u talkin to every tom's hairy dick...or is it tom dick and harry lol...and messin wit like 20 dudes at the same time??? And then u get mad at me cuz I don't wanna hear ur same ass story time and time again...u've asked for my advice and I gave u my thoughts...say wut u mean and mean wut u say...u want it...state it...claim it and go for it....but instead u decide to continue on a path that will not bring u to ur desired destination...But u wanna be mad at me for stating my thoughts....ummm ok...don't wanna know then don't ask me....K.R.A.D.

I've learned that honesty is truly the best policy. Dealing wit friends, family, and life in general is less stressful when u say wut u mean. Now im not sayin cuss someone out whenever u feel like it cuz not all situations allow for that....but u can choose ur words and get the same effect as a good ol fashioned cussin.

Soooo to wrap this up...say wut u mean and mean wut u say...im workin on it myself...been doin it way more often in.

We Did It....

2008-07-21T01:29:00.000-04:00

So in a respone to Shawn's request/demand, Fuzzy and I upheld our part of the one-sided bargain and cooked. Let's not talk about our planning for today lol. Anyway now Shawn can't complain/cuss me out bout the food X gets (and will continue to get lol) cuz he left wit containers and plates ::screamin like a chinese lady in a nail salon:: LUV U SHAWN lol

So after waking up at the asscrack of dawnfrom a phone call that I always enjoy, I got busy in the kitchen. Made some fresh greens, cabbage, my secret chicken, cornbread, a resse cake, some experimental chicken, (which came out great), and some sangria. Fuzzy made some chicken, stuffin, and potatoes. Damn near sweated my kakes off lol. We had ourselves a mini thanksgiving/sunday dinner lol.

We had a good time eatin, talking, and buggin out. Im so glad that these people (X, Fuzzy, Shawn, etc.) came into my life. I've learned and further matured cuz of them. I can talk to them about a variety of situations that pop up in my reality. We had a good time and a few surprises (oh walk back n the house after leavin for 2.5 mins...lucky bastards lol).

I hope everyone enjoyed themselves as I did and I look forward to the meals that are to come cuz yall know I like to cook (and won't eat lol)

Jus a dose....

2008-07-12T20:15:00.000-04:00

I've been asked a few times bout my use of the word reality. It has been said (dont know by who lol) that one's reality is a result of their perception and interpretation of the situations they have experienced throughout their life. These experiences tend to cause individuals to view, think, operate, and interpret daily situations differently. This factor is one of many contributors to our unique individuality.

The things that I have experienced and dealt with have caused me to think/operate in ways that may be viewed as slightly different than others. However, does that make my reality wrong or is it right? Is my way of thinking the complete opposite of the norm? Am I wrong for seeking happiness if in the process other people get pissed off? Ummm, do I really care lol???

Should I let the opinions of others deter me from what I want to achieve? Most of the time I really don't care cuz people are gonna do wut they do and say wut they want regardless right? How's that expression go...ur not doing right unless people are talkin about u? Ok...ok..I know that's not always the case but dammit it can still apply. If I listened or concerned myself with the negative views and opinons of others I wouldn't be who or where I am now in life. Athough I struggle at times (like most people do) I think I have been successful and have lived a pretty decent life. I've met some interesting people throughout my journey through life and have learned from each of them.

I've recently learned that some people that I've come in contact with do not fit in the reality I exist in or am trying to create. I've had to make some decisions about the people I surround myself with because I've begun to see how people truly operate. Im trying to surround myself with positive people who are about something and im starting to notice that this wasn't the case. Im not sayin that im perfect or anywhere near but I try (at times) to do the best I can.

If someone is trying to better themselves shouldn't they surround themselves with like minded individuals? Is it wrong to erase people from your reality if they're not about the same things you are? Does it make you a jerk for cutting people outta your life instead of just accepting them? I'll leave that up to you cuz after all...reality is wut u make of it...I jus gave u a small dose of mine.

What teachers make???

2008-07-10T19:33:00.001-04:00

This is something for my fellow educators....stay strong

WHAT TEACHERS MAKE

The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life.

One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?"

He reminded the other dinner guests what they say about teachers:
"Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach."

To stress his point he said to another guest; "You're a teacher, Bonnie. Be honest. What do you make?"

Bonnie, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied, "You
Want to know what I make? (She paused for a second, then began...)
"Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.
I make a C+ feel like the Congressional Medal of Honor.
I make kids sit through 40 minutes of class time when their parents can't make them sit for 5 without an I Pod, Game Cube or movie rental... You want to know what I make?" (She paused again and looked at each and every person at the table.)
I make kids wonder.
I make them question.
I make them criticize.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions.
I teach them to write and then I make them write.
I make them read, read, read.
I make them show all their work in math.
I make my students from other countries learn everything they need
To know in English while preserving their unique cultural identity.
I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.
I make my students stand to say the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag,
Because we live in the United States of America.
Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they were given, work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life.

(Bonnie paused one last time and then continued.) "Then, when people try to judge me by what I make, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention because they are ignorant... You want to know what I make?
I MAKE A DIFFERENCE. What do you make?"

THERE IS MUCH TRUTH IN THIS STATEMENT:
"Teachers make every other profession "

Quickcheck....not!!!!

2008-07-05T01:58:00.001-04:00

So I was talking on the phone with Fuzzy and we both decided to go to quickcheck. He wanted some coke and I wanted a sandwich. This was supposed to be a quick trip but because I wanted honey turkey my quickcheck trip turned into scavenger hunt.

Can someone please tell me why every quickcheck in union was out of honey turkey? And the sad thing about it is that im not exaggerating lol. I managed to find one that had the turkey (after about 20 mins) but they didn't have the bread I liked. Obviously I was bored and craving that damn sandwich.

Soooo after about a half hour of searchin, driving thru different towns, and cussin out every quickcheck employee I came across, I gave up my sandwich dream and settled for something else. Makes no sense that Fuzzy got his stuff and made it back home before I cussed out the second employee.

This is clearly some bull and I will be writing my congressman about this injustice. Anyone have anything they want me to include in my letter???

Can't You Take A Hint

2008-07-01T22:54:00.000-04:00

So my brother calls me the other day and tells me that he's gonna stay with me for about 4 days...now notice how I said he told me..not asked...so im thinkin wut the...so to spare his feeling I tell him I have errands to run and I gotta look for a job (thas a issue for a later post lol). Now a normal person woulda caught the hint but nooooo....I get stuck wit the person that has a counter for everythin I throw at him. He was sayin that he would go wit me here and go there and rah rah rah...umm last time I checked didn't like being held hostage.

Now don't get me wrong my bro and I have been there for each other thru thick and thin (even though I really wasn't feelin him cuz he was talkin shit but thas another story) but that doesn't mean that I wanted to be held captive. He was supposed to be on a trip for his job but he quit but didn't wanna stay home. Now u may be thinkin....wut does that have to do with me..right??? I was thinkin the same thing but me tryin to be nice I let him come over. Oh yeah did I mention the fact he invited himself and was walkin over to my house before I could say anything???

Needless to say he was with me for the majority of the week/weekend and in order for me to get him to go home I had to be semi-rude after a day at the beach and jus tell his ass to get in the car. I felt bad about it but can I have jus a lil alone time...I mean damn...give us us free...and I know people were tired of my captivity texts...thanx for hangin in there wit me

Why is it????

2008-06-21T02:53:00.000-04:00

Have u ever wondered y is it that ur heart and brain argue at times? Why does ur heart want somethin that ur brain knows isn't good for u or that it might cause u problems? Do u igonor ur heart and listen to ur brain? But doesn't that lead to ur heart yearning for somethin????? But if u listen to ur heart , does that mean ur brain is gonna be naggin u cuz shit jus aint right???

I've been goin thru a lot of stuff lately and my brain and heart have been goin at it and the shit is driving me crazy. And the sad part about it is that it's jus not in one area of my life....im dealin with shit in my professional life, personal life, romantic life (or lack thereof lol), futuristic life, etc...Im goin thru it right now wit my emotions and feelings about a certain situation but I'm hoping and prayin that things will work out for the best.....

Those that know me know that I try to stay a positive and upbeat person. I have been a source of advice more times than I can count and I love being able to provide my insight into certain situations.....but even those like me have our moments of doubt and have our breakdowns. Who do we turn to for advice??? Who is there to be a sounding board for our problems? For thost ath have helped me throught these tough times in my life.....I thank you for ur encouraging words and insight.....without it I would probably gone crazy (ok...more crazy than I am now)...my circle of friends is small and I like to keep it that way lol...for those who have come into my circle (or me into ur circle) ur stuck wit me now and it's ur fault that now Im on here lol

I know Im a lil sporadic in this blog...but im tryin to keep it together lol...its late so im gonna end this wit some words of encouragement:

**The things u work hardest for are the things you appreciate the most
**Nobody is worth your tears....but the one that is won't make u cry
**When one door closes another one opens (thanx buddy)